And Nine Makes Eggroll
by SandyJ62
Summary: Finally, Naruto has a date with Hinata! Will it turn out as he imagined it? Sakura, Sai, Team Hebi, Deidara, and Tobi are all included in this most silly tale. Modern Konoha/AU/Friendship/Rivalry. Please read and review.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I of course do not own Naruto, Masashi Kishimoto does. To the best of my knowledge "The Konoha Ninja Handbook" does not exist in canon or anywhere else. I came up with this as I was writing. It is purely coincidence if something like this does actually exist someplace.

Note: I wrote this fic for a friend who is a dyed-in-the-wool NaruHina fan. The idea was born of a conversation we had about what would happen on a double date with Naruto, Hinata, Sai and Sakura. Hope you like it. Your thoughts would be appreciated, so please review.

FYI: I refer to the room where the movie is playing to as the screen/screening room.

* * *

_Rule number one from "The Konoha Ninja Handbook" - In order to guarantee success, a ninja must research and prepare for a mission._

BANG. BANG. BANG. The sound reverberated all the way back to the bathroom where Naruto, wrapped in a towel, was attempting to tame his yellow mane with a brush.

"I'm coming already, hold your horses", Naruto yelled, in reply to the noise coming from his front door.

Upon opening said door, Sai came barreling in, "Naruto, you're not ready yet? We are supposed to be picking up the girls in 15 minutes!"

"Sai, relax. Don't you know anything about girls? They are always at least 30 minutes late getting ready. Besides, all I have to do is dress and I'll be done. It only takes about 20 minutes to get to Sakura's place. With any luck we'll only have to wait 10 minutes for them."

"I'm sorry, Naruto, I guess I'm just excited. It took me a long time to work up the nerve to ask Sakura out. I don't want to mess this up. Do I look alright?"

But Naruto didn't hear him as he was currently attempting to pull his orange polo shirt over his head and belt his jeans at the same time.

Sai, looking at Naruto in amazement said, "Are you really going to wear that hideous orange shirt?"

"I'll have you know orange is my lucky color. And besides, Hinata said this was her favorite shirt."

"Really, I think she might have been fibbing. Are you sure it's dressy enough for our first date?"

"Sai, we are going to the movies. Of course it's dressy enough. Speaking of "dressy", sheesh, we're going on a date, not a job interview," Naruto said, hastily beginning to un-tuck Sai's mint green, striped oxford shirt.

"Get your hands out of my pants! What are you, a perv?"

"What? I was just trying to fix your shirt. You look way too stuffy and serious. Sai, we are supposed to be having fun! Are you sure that color won't clash with Sakura's hair?"

"Yes. I picked it to match Sakura's eyes."

"Well it reminds me of frogs. Anyway, whatever. I'm ready so let's go."

***********************

"Now Hinata, don't worry, I've got plenty of smelling salts. Plus, here take this lace handkerchief. It's infused with a special oil. If you start to feel faint, bring it up to your nose and you'll be just fine. If Naruto notices, which I doubt he will, he'll probably just think you are acting coy. I'm sure he'll find it very cute."

"Ok, Sakura, if you say so."

"Hinata, Naruto adores you! Ok, it took him forever to finally figure it out, but in his eyes you can do no wrong, so just relax, OK."

Finally, a smile came to the Hyuuga girl's lips, "You're right. I just want this date to go well. Sometimes I wonder how I got so lucky. I was afraid my feelings for Naruto would never be returned."

"I know how you feel, Hinata. After everything that happened with Sasuke, I was afraid to take a chance, especially with Sai. I thought people would think the only reason I was with him was because of his resemblance to Sasuke. And while that is what initially attracted me to him, I have grown very fond of Sai for all the ways he is NOT like Sasuke. It took me a while, but I finally figured out that Sasuke was not capable of giving me what I needed or wanted. I'm just glad you don't seem to have the same problems with Naruto."

"True, Naruto has always been a warm, giving person. Thank you, Sakura. You know, I think we're going to have a fantastic time."

"I know we are! Now let's get finished dressing. The boys should be here soon."

***********************

Knocking on the door of the Haruno household, Sai nervously fingered the collar of his shirt wondering if they would pass muster. He had heard Sakura's father was rather picky when it came to who dated his only daughter.

And as if reading his mind Naruto said, "I heard Sakura's father was a little tough, but fair. As long as we behave respectfully to him and Sakura's mother, we'll pass with flying colors!'

"I heard he once put one of Sakura's would-be suitors in the hospital."

"Sai, don't be stupid. That was just a rumor", Naruto ranted before the door opened suddenly, causing them both to come to attention as if they were standing for inspection in front of the Hokage herself."

Sakura's mom answered the door explaining, "Sakura's father is working late, but he'll be home later. Why don't you both come in. The girls will be down any minute."

Inwardly sighing with relief, both boys responded in unison, "Yes. ma'am", as they entered the residence.

"Have a seat boys", she said gesturing to the maroon leather sofa. Would you like some lemonade?", Mrs. Haruno asked.

Sai, seemed to have lost his tongue to a cat, so Naruto answered for them both, "Yes, we would love some. I hear you make your lemonade from lemons you grow in your yard and that it's the best lemonade this side of the Fire Country."

"Oh, Naruto, you really are quite the charmer. Thank you for saying so", Mrs. Haruno said smiling, before going into the kitchen for the drinks.

Sai just looked at Naruto, wondering if it was a good idea to be such a suck up, but decided that Naruto knew more than he did, so maybe he should try it too.

Returning to the living room, Mrs. Haruno sat the tall glasses in front of the boys before taking the seat opposite them. There was a bright lemon slice tucked onto the rim of each glass which was dusted with a light coating of fine sugar.

Naruto being Naruto, he quickly reached for his glass, drinking half the contents in one swallow. Wiping his mouth with the napkin Mrs. Haruno offered, he grinned, "It is true! This is the best lemonade I have ever tasted."

Sai finally tasted his and replied with equal enthusiasm, "Why yes, I couldn't agree more. As a matter of fact, I recently did some research on lemons at the library. Did you know that it takes up to 18 months for lemons to ripen once they are pollinated? A lot of people don't know this but, lemons have a higher sugar content than strawberries and have 1/3 more vitamin C than limes. At one time, lemons were a highly prized commodity ...", Sai began but never finished, noticing the look on Naruto's face. "Sorry, I guess I went a little overboard", Sai said blushing furiously.

At Sai's obvious discomfort, Naruto and Mrs. Haruno began laughing.

"Sai, you kill me!", Naruto shouted not so gently slapping Sai on the back.

"Sai, that was very considerate of you to learn so much about lemons for your date with Sakura. I guess it's no secret that I'm a little obsessed with lemons. There's no need for you to be embarrassed. I find it very refreshing when a young man like you takes the time to learn about his date's mother. It's sweet and a little old-fashioned. I'm sure Sakura's father will like you both very much. And Mr. Hyuuga too."

"Thank you Mrs. Haruno", Sai responded grinning, pleased that all his hard work had paid off.

"Yeah, me too, Mrs. Haruno. Even though we've both known the girls for a while this is the first time we've ever actually met. It's important for both of us took make a good impression with you."

"You're welcome boys." And with a twinkle in her eye, Mrs. Haruno looked toward the staircase. Both boys followed her gaze to watch Sakura lead Hinata down the steps.

***********************

Hinata shyly followed Sakura. She was wearing a white halter dress with a royal blue flower print, small hints of orange splashed here and there. The style of the dress had a bare back, exposing her graceful neck and shoulders. A flower pin was holding back her bangs, perfectly complementing the blue-black glossiness of her hair.

Wow, Naruto thought. Hinata is so beautiful. I'm the luckiest guy in Konoha.

Equally pretty, Sakura was wearing her family colors in the form of a simple solid maroon tank dress that nicely hugged her curves only hinting at what was underneath. The sleeveless dress accentuated her thing long arms and the hem stopped just below her knees, exposing her equally long and slender legs. Her pink hair was free of it's usual headband and was flattened in an attractive bob style, the ends curling up at her graceful jaw line.

Sai could only stare at her dumbfounded. He couldn't believe that Sakura was actually going on a date with him. When he thought back at their first few encounters, he could only cringe. He hoped his communication skills had improved enough to avoid repeating those mistakes.

"I hope we haven't kept you waiting too long Sai, Naruto. Thanks for keeping them company Mom."

"You're welcome Sakura", Mrs. Haruno said standing up, looking approvingly at all four of them. "Now if you'll all excuse me, I think I'll retire to the den for the evening to do some reading. Have a good time. Don't forget to call if you need anything."

Both boys stood and said, "Good night Mrs. Haruno."

Naruto was the first to speak out, "You look great Hinata!"

"Thank you Naruto", Hinata replied, feeling a renewed confidence in herself and glad she took Sakura's advice about wearing the dress.

Not to be outdone, Sai walked over to Sakura and taking her slender hand in his, he said, "You too, look very beautiful, Sakura. I am honored to be in your presence."

"Thank you Sai", Sakura responded, happy beyond words.

Naruto spoke, "Have you girls decided what movie you would like to see?"

Reluctantly breaking her gaze from Sai, Sakura said, "Why don't we see Summer of the Ninja. It's part comedy, part romance, but not too mushy since there is quite a bit of fighting too."

"Cool, I've actually been wanting to see that movie. I heard the fight scenes are awesome. Let's go!"

***********************

Meanwhile, back at Team Hebi headquarters, an excited Karin prepares for her date with Sasuke...

"Karin, aren't you ready yet?", Suigetsu yelled at the closed bedroom door of their lone female team member.

Downstairs, Juugo was balled up in a corner of their "wreck" room in the fetal position. Sasuke was pacing back and forth in front of him thinking. I'd better go upstairs and see what's going on.

"Yo, Karin! I don't think Sasuke can keep Juugo under control much longer. We gotta go NOW!", Suigetsu yelled.

"Fine. I'm coming", Karin shouted back opening the door right into her teammate's face.

Luckily for him, whatever substance his body was made of ensured that there was no permanent damage. Nonetheless, he shouted again at her in annoyance, "Watch what you're doing!"

Suigetsu stared at her intently, looking for some piece of evidence to explain her unusually long preparation time. Unsuccessful at finding any, he asked, "What took you so long? You don't _look_ any different than usual", he mocked, earning him a vicious punch in the nose from his irate team member.

Just as he was about to return the favor, Sasuke appeared snarling, "What are you two idiots doing? I finally got Juugo under control. Let's go! I don't want to miss the le.., I mean the previews."

At the sight of her gorgeous leader, Karin's face brightened, and she said in a voice filled with sweetness and light, "Sasuke, I'm ready. Can we sit in the balcony? Just you and me, all alone?", she cooed. Knowing better, she resisted the urge to brush his unruly bangs away from his eyes.

Sasuke looked at her, ready to reduce her to a pile of ash with his "Uchiha death glare", but thought better of it. After all, they were suppose to being going on a date. He needed her to believe that for as long as possible if his plans were to succeed. Summoning up all the acting skills he could muster he said, "Yes, we can sit in the balcony. It will be more private. And by the way, you look very pretty tonight."

"BWAAAH HA HA HA HA! Who are you and what have you done with our Sasuke?", Suigetsu exclaimed, laughing so hard he was doubled up on the floor, tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Sasuke, why do they have to come with us tonight?", Karin whined.

Patiently, as if talking to a child, he explained, "They will be acting as our body guards. After all, we will be in enemy territory and we want to make sure we are not attacked. Besides, with them there, I can concentrate on you all night."

Appeased, an outwardly calm Karin took Sasuke's offered hand, while her inner self was squeeing like a rabid fan girl.

Once, Suigetsu stopped laughing, the three of them left their hidden lair, remembering to take the now peaceful Juugo with them on the way out.

***********************

"Tobi, are you ready yet? We have to get to the movie theater before they open up", Deidara said.

"Is my costume on right? It feels weird?", Tobi inquired.

"You moron, it's on backwards. Fix it and let's get going!", Deidara answered.

"All right all ready, what's the rush?", Tobi asked.

"Don't you remember the plan? We are supposed to be replacing the regular snack bar employees so we can perform surveillance on the leaf nin."

"So, tell me why are we doing this type of mission? Isn't surveillance a little below us? I mean we are Akatsuki after all. Don't we have some minions who can do this grunt work?", Tobi complained.

"I agree with you. But our fearless leader insisted we go. Apparently he doesn't trust the rank and file with this mission. We are not just going to keep an eye on your average leaf nin. We are going to be watching Naruto, the host of the kyuubi. We are going to Konoha in secret to observe him in his natural habitat in order to determine any of his previously undetermined weaknesses and strengths", Deidara explained.

"Okay, Deidara, I'm ready!"

Finally Deidara thinks to himself, he finally understands the importance of this mission.

"Deidara, can we stop for some rice balls on the way? I really love those little sweet ones on a stick", Tobi implored, his puppy dog eyes the size of saucers.

By the time Tobi hit the ground, he had landed at the halfway mark to Konoha. With the help of his clay bird, Deidara was soon flying off with his fellow cohort's semi-conscious body. In no time, they had arrived in Konoha and were standing in front of the still unopened theater.

to be continued...

***********************************************************************


	2. Chapter 2

_Rule number two from "The Konoha Ninja Handbook" - A ninja must be able to see through deception. _

"Tobi, are you going to give me the silent treatment all day?", Deidara shouted exasperated at his mute companion. "C'mon, when this mission is over, I'll treat you to some of those rice balls you like so much."

"Jerk. You could at least apologize for almost breaking every bone in my body!", Tobi whined.

"Firstly, I did not almost break every bone in your body. You landed in some bushes so you were only a little unconscious. Secondly, you deserved it! You were being annoying. You're an Akatsuki now. Behave like one!"

"So, Deidara, which one should I behave like? I could get a god complex like Hidan and "punish" my enemies for their blasphemy. Maybe I can go postal on my whole clan, like Itachi? I could always kill my partners like Kakuzu. Or maybe I can be like Konan, and exist only for my partner. Come to think of it, I already do that! And what do I get in return? Nothing, but abuse! "

"Arrrrggggghhhhhhh! Fine. I'm sorry. I'm an abusive jerk. If I promise to be nicer to you from now on will you just quit sulking and get with the mission?"

"Apology accepted. You still owe me those rice balls", Tobi said.

***********************

Suigetsu and Juugo watched as Sasuke and Karin approached the ticket booth. They were too far away to see exactly what was going on, but shortly, Sasuke was signaling them to cross the street and join them.

"Sasuke, what happened to those two kids?", Juugo asked. "You didn't kill them did you?"

"No, of course not. I put them under a genjutsu. They wandered away on their own. When they wake up tomorrow in their own beds unharmed, they won't remember a single thing."

"Juugo, you're not going soft on us, are you?", asked Suigetsu.

"No, not when it comes to our real enemies. Where is Karin?"

"She went to find some uniforms for you two", Sasuke replied, just as Karin returned.

"Here, put these clothes on", Karin said as she handed the two sets of clothes to her teammates.

"Karin, go in ahead of me. Check for the exits in the screening room and for any places where our enemies could hide", Sasuke asked. "I'll join you when I'm done here."

Once Karin left, Suigetsu said, "Karin has no idea what's going on does she?"

"Of course not", Sasuke responded. "If she had any idea this was something other than a date, she never would have come along. Without her, I would look pretty conspicuous in a movie theater all by myself. I'm leaving. Just make sure no one shows up to interfere with my plans."

***********************

"It's a good thing we found this back entrance. It's more private than the front door. I was feeling a little too exposed out there", Tobi said.

"Shhh, Tobi. I hear some people."

Following the voices, Tobi and Deidara come across what looks like a locker room, where two unsuspecting employees are talking.

"I hate my job! This place sucks", dude 1 says to dude 2.

"Yeah, totally! This is the last summer I work here!", dude 2 says.

"Dude 2, I'm thinking we could hitchhike across the country and live off the land. And when we get to the west coast, we could find these real awesome jobs, doing, uh, I don't know what, but they would be so cool!"

"Awesome, Dude 1!"

cheep, cheep, cheep

"Dude 2, check out the cute little bird", dude 1 says, picking up the little figurine.

BAM!

Once the smoke cleared, Tobi entered what was left of the little room and surveyed the damage. Deidara was no where to be seen. "No! Deidara, you're dead! You've really blown yourself up this time. I knew this would happen. What now?", Tobi cried wiping the tears from his face with his sleeves. "I pledge to complete this mission in honor of you, my crazy bomb loving art freak! OWIE!"

"I'm not dead you moron!", Deidara shouted in disbelief. According to Tobi, he had already died numerous times.

"You're alive!", Tobi shouted putting the blonde in a bear hug. Where did you go? I was worried."

"I went to look for a place to hide these two. And besides, I didn't use a destructive explosive. I just used a stun bomb. So how could I be dead? Remember we were told not to kill anyone unless absolutely necessary. We don't want to attract attention. Now help me hide these two in the closet. We have to get out to the snack bar. People will be coming in soon."

***********************

The two couples walked hand in hand down the sidewalk towards the theater. Every once in a while Sakura and Sai would look at each other smiling, silently enjoying each other's company. Meanwhile, Naruto had Hinata giggling over his outrageously exaggerated stories of his latest mission. The bright lights of the ticket booth came into view as they approached the clerk. Thanks to a recently modern invention, he and Sai had already purchased their tickets. All that was left, was to show their identification.

Sai looked at the clerk in the booth with apprehension. He seemed a little on the large side for the typical teenaged movie theater employee. And when they approached the ticket taker, he also seemed out of place. Sai thought his hands felt slippery, almost wet, when he handed him his ticket. Better not say anything to the girls. No need to worry them.

Walking into the lobby, Hinata remarked to Sakura, "It's a good thing we brought these wraps with us. It feels a little chilly inside here."

"Yeah, good call, Hinata. The theater was recently remodeled to include climate control, but I sometimes think they go overboard."

"Girls, will you be comfortable enough?", asked Sai with concern.

"We'll be fine Sai", remarked Sakura. "I guess we'll just have to sit close together to keep warm", she said, causing Sai to blush again. "Can you wait for a few minutes, Hinata and I have to powder our noses."

"Of course girls, you have plenty of time. Sai and I will get some popcorn and drinks."

"That sounds great Naruto. We'll be right back", Sakura responded.

"Naruto, did you notice anything about the clerk in the ticket booth? He looked a little familiar to me. And what about the guy who took our ticket?"

"No. You know, you're an awfully suspicious guy. I guess that's because of your root background", Naruto replied.

"You're probably right Naruto", Sai said as they approached the two workers at the snack bar. But yet again, Sai's senses were on alert. The tall worker on the left was an older male with long blonde hair, pulled up into a pony tail. At least he thought he was a male. The other worker on his right had dark brown spiky hair, kind of like Naruto's. They were both dressed in black ninja outfits, masks just covering the bottom of their faces.

Naruto addressing the blonde said, "Hey, you're a cutie. Are you new to Konoha?"

The blonde thought to himself, "Is he an idiot? I'd better play along with him so he doesn't get suspicious."

Batting his eyelashes and twirling his long blonde hair he responded in his best "girly" voice, "Why yes. Me and my brother just got in town, but we like it here a lot. We've already met soooo many friendly people." "Her brother" just looked at "her" in confusion, but nobody seemed to notice the odd look on his face.

"Konoha residents are generally friendly even to newcomers. I'm glad you like it here. If you ever need someone to show you around just call me, Naruto Uzumaki! Oh and this is Sai, no last name. What are your names?"

"My name is Natsuko and my brother's name is Jun", the blonde replied.

"I love that name - Natsuko, doesn't it mean summer child?", asked Naruto.

Once again in that fake falsetto voice "she" responded, "Thank you. It does. I love the summer don't you?"

And before they could continue this ridiculous conversation "Jun" rudely interrupted, "Hey, are you two going to order anything?"

"Oh, sorry, about that. Sai and I would like 4 medium lemonades and 2 large popcorns."

While "Jun" put together their order, "Natsuko" took their money. Naruto took advantage of their closeness when "she" gave him his change to ask, "Why are you wearing pj's at work? Don't you think you look silly?"

Handing Naruto and Sai their snacks the spiky-haired brother answered, "We are dressed as ninjas in honor of tonight's new movie, Summer of the Ninja."

"Oh, of course, how stupid of me", Naruto responded hitting his forehead with the palm of his hand. Just then, the girls returned and the four of them entered the screening room. They settled into their seats at the very rear of the theater just in time to see the start of the movie.

to be continued...

***********************


	3. Chapter 3

Rule number three from "The Konoha Ninja Handbook" - A ninja must be ready for anything.

A bored Sasuke sat in the balcony, waiting for his prey to enter. This is the perfect spot he thought to himself. I can see everyone who enters and exits. An excited Karin fidgeted in her seat, occasionally elbowing him in the side. How was he suppose to concentrate on his mission with all this activity. Giving her a frigid stare he snarled, "What's wrong with you? Have you never been to the movies before?"

"No. You don't get a lot of free time working for someone as demanding as Orochimaru. I was responsible for running one of his busiest detention-research centers. Not only did I have to keep the inmates in line, but I also helped Kabuto with his experiments", Karin responded.

"You didn't do it all by yourself. Didn't you have Suigetsu and Juugo for help?"

"Not before you brought us all together. Juugo was just another one of Orochimaru's experiments gone bad. He rarely left his cell. As for Suigetsu? Even though he was wasn't part of the general population, he nonetheless was a prisoner, just like the rest . It was just me, myself, and I. And of course Kabuto, when they got around to visiting, which was not very often. Of course, I rarely saw Orochimaru. I wasn't important enough for him to waste time on."

"So, Karin, what's your pathetic story? Everyone of Orochimaru's pupils seem to have one. What brought you to serve the snake?", Sasuke sneered, sure he was going to hear the usual war orphan story, or some variation of it.

"I met Orochimaru while me and my father were in a temporary shelter. Our apartment had been destroyed in an electrical fire. We needed some place to stay while he looked for something permanent for us.

"What was Orochimaru doing there?"

"He and Kabuto were looking for someone. They asked me and my father if we knew this particular person. Of course we didn't, we had just gotten there."

"What was special about you that caught Orochimaru's eye?", Sasuke asked.

"Kabuto noticed the bandage on my father's head and asked if he could look at it. He said he was a doctor. When he asked who put in the stitches, I said I did. When they looked at me like I was a liar, my father told them how I spent all of my spare time reading medical journals. He complained about how I brought home every injured animal I found so I could nurse them back to health and that was how I learned to sew stitches. Then they left."

"What happened to your mom?"

"She left after I was born. My dad never talked about her", Karin replied, no hint of bitterness or for that matter any emotion at all.

"That doesn't explain how you ended up with Orochimaru and company."

"A few days later, Kabuto came back by himself. By then my father had died. Apparently he had damage from smoke inhalation we didn't know about. I had no other family to take me in and no money of my own to live on. Kabuto had found out about my situation from the shelter supervisor. He asked me if I wanted to work for Orochimaru. He said Orochimaru was rich and would pay for my education to become a real doctor. But in the meantime, he would teach me everything he knew about medicine in return for my loyalty. What could I say? I said yes and moved out that very day."

Listening to her story, Sasuke was reminded of his own circumstances growing up. So she was an orphan, just like me he thought to himself. My only family left was a brother I wasn't particularly close to. He was away at college and couldn't be expected to take care of a kid. Because of my parent's will, I was able to grow up in my family home, alone, surrounded only by photos and my memories of happier times. There were friends of my parents who cared though. Maybe not enough for them to take me in, but enough to make sure I grew up with everything I needed. They even offered to help pay my college tuition so I could follow in my brother's footsteps and go into business with him. What did I do to thank them? I betrayed them and ran away. Was Kakashi right? Was I really nothing but a spoiled brat?

Suddenly he asked, "Karin, did you ever get to go to school?"

"Are you kidding me? Of course not. Over the years I repeatedly asked when they were going to send me to college to become a doctor. They always said they couldn't spare me. I was too valuable to let go. I finally realized they had never planned on keeping their promises to me. So, I resigned myself to being nothing more than Kabuto's assistant. I told myself, what did I need school for, I already was a doctor of sorts. Kabuto taught me all sorts of forbidden medical techniques. I could already heal as well as he could. My potions were almost as good as his too. As long Kabuto had something new to teach me I made excuses to myself as to why I stayed. The real reason I stayed? I had no where else to go. So I gave up on my dream to become somebody and settled for being a nobody", she responded in a matter of fact way.

Sasuke looked at her as if for the first time. He could see the sadness in her eyes that had probably always been there if he had bothered to notice.

When she realized he was staring at her with pity, she said, "Bah! I was a fool! By the time I figured out the truth it was too late for me. But, you? You got out before your life was ruined. You can be whoever you want to be. You can do whatever you want. I'm glad for you", Karin said with only a small hint of regret in her voice.

And before he knew what he was saying he told Karin, "When we get back home I'll make some phone calls. I know some people who can help you go back to school, if that is what you want. They can even help you apply for financial aid. I haven't spoken to them in a while, but I'm sure they would help you out as a favor to me."

Sasuke thought to himself. The last time I talked to them it got ugly. Almost a whole year has passed since then. We all said and did things we didn't mean. I'm sure Kakashi has forgiven me by now but, what about Naruto? Does he ever think about me? Would he remember what today is or would he forget on purpose to get back at me?

"Sasuke. Why would you help me?", Karin asked breaking into his thoughts.

"You three are my family now. You've been nothing but loyal to me. You've done everything I've asked without question. I haven't exactly been a good friend. It's about time I started treating you better", before something happens and I lose you all too, Sasuke thought.

"Thank you Sasuke", she said, throwing her arms around the him.

Surprisingly, he found himself returning the embrace, wondering if he could find some kind of purpose, some kind of happiness with this bizarre group of people he had adopted. "Your welcome", he replied, hoping against all odds that he could.

Abruptly breaking free of his grasp, she exclaimed in a low voice, "The movie is starting. I'm so excited, I don't even care whether or not it's any good."

Damn, Sasuke thought. I completely forgot to watch for Naruto. Luckily for him there were only four other people. And in the middle of the group he found his yellow haired rival. Good, he's right where I can see him. Looking again at Karin, who was engrossed watching the flickering screen, he thought, at least she's having a good time. If I play my cards right, she'll never find out the real reason for us being here.

***********************

A quiet had descended on the crowd watching the movie, as Hinata stared at Naruto thinking. This is even better than I thought it would be. Finally, I have Naruto to myself. He is usually so focused on his ambitions. It's nice to see him back to normal. He used to be so carefree. This whole Sasuke business is starting to take a toll on him. I hope all that extra training I've been doing with Neji will pay off. Then I can finally be helpful to Naruto in a meaningful way. And when we've brought Sasuke back together, he can finally be at peace with himself.

Naruto was lost in his own world. Wait until he sees the one I sent him this year. It took me forever to find one that wasn't too mushy. I hope he likes it. Coming back to reality he could feel her eyes on him, Naruto turned to Hinata and asked, "Are you Ok Hinata? You seem, I don't know, serious all of a sudden."

Smiling back at the yellow haired nin, Hinata replied, "I'm fine. I was just thinking how nice it was to see you enjoy yourself for a change. It's been a while since I've seen you so relaxed."

"I know. And I have you to thank for that. Without your strength I don't know if I would have made it."

"Naruto, I was happy to be there for you. And next time, you will succeed in bringing back Sasuke and I will help you", Hinata whispered, allowing Naruto to rest his head in the crook of her neck. She could feel a slight dampness on her skin as Naruto whispered back a simple, "Thank you."

***********************

On screen, the yellow haired ninja character was fighting his darker haired enemy for the affections of the fair maiden. The rivals somehow entangled in a fishing net, were rolling around the floor in a comical fashion.

Sakura leaned over to Sai and said, "I'm sorry, I thought this movie would be better." But, Sai who could not hear her over his own laughter, said "Sakura, this is really a funny movie!"

Sakura looked over at Naruto and Hinata, both of them laughing hysterically at the antics on the screen. Thinking to herself, she realized the two main characters reminded her of her two oldest friends. And at that point, she began to laugh in spite of herself.

Just as it appeared the yellow haired nin was to prevail, the screen went blank.

to be continued...

***********************


	4. Chapter 4

Rule number four from "The Konoha Ninja Handbook" - A ninja must never let his guard down.

While the three couples were enjoying the movie in the quiet darkness, that is before the technical glitch, it was a completely different atmosphere in the lobby.

Clearly Team Hebi, ahem, Team Taka, recognized the two Akatsuki members. Deidara was engaging Suigetsu in mortal combat, while Tobi and Juugo were busy trading blows behind the snack counter. Popcorn was being tossed around like salty kunai. Full drink cups were being used as impromptu shuriken. Juugo was finding that frozen candy bars worked well against Tobi, having temporarily lost his ninja mask, was trying to catch them in his mouth.

"What's the Akatsuki doing here in a movie theater?", Juugo asked. "Deidara, I thought you got yourself blown up by Sasuke?***", he shouted across the room.

"Sasuke couldn't blow his own nose. Speaking of the drama queen, where is he? Hiding somewhere while his team does his dirty work."

"Don't talk about our Sasuke like that! Take it back, or else!", Juugo threatened.

"Or else what!", Deidara countered.

Just then, a local police officer wandered into the lobby. All four of the nin froze in their places, not knowing what to do.

"Now boys", the officer drawled. "What seems to be the problem. I'm getting complaints from the neighbors about noise. I know, boys can be boys, and in my day, heck, I pulled plenty of stunts like this, but can you keep it down some? Oh, and make sure you clean this mess. My cousin owns this place and he'll fire you all if he sees this.

All of them were completely at a loss for words until Deidara replied, "Yes, sir. Sorry, sir. We'll get right on that."

"I'm sure you will", the officer drawled back, leaving the lobby to go about his way, whistling off key, twirling his wooden night stick.

The four of them looked at each other, Deidara once again speaking, "There is no way I'm cleaning up this mess. I'm Akatsuki. I have my honor. Tobi, quit eating those candy bars. You're hyper enough already."

"Tobi is a good boy! I'll eat all the candy I want. You're not the boss of me!", Tobi yelled back, his ninja mask once again covering the lower half of his face. "Besides, what the hell are we doing here? You know, I haven't had a vacation in 6 months. I was supposed to be off tonight. Now I'm stuck doing surveillance on the leaf nin. For god sakes, they're just going to the movies on a date."

"Hey morons", shouted Suigetsu, "we're supposed to be fighting, remember?"

"You know he has a point. What are we doing here?", Juugo asked his sticky teammate. "I don't even feel like killing anyone now. I'm tired and I want a vacation too! All we ever do is work, work, work!"

"Juugo", whispered Suigetsu, pulling his teammate aside away from the two Akatsuki who were still glaring hate and discontent at each other. "Sasuke and Karin are in the screening room, watching the leaf nin and a movie. We are supposed to make sure nobody interferes with Sasuke's plans."

"Suigetsu, what the hell are his plans anyway?"

"Big guy, like I know? He doesn't tell me everything, you know."

"Since when does he ever tell us anything. This whole mission seems a little fishy if you ask me. Lately he's been acting weird, even for him. He's checked his post office box at least twice a day, every day this week. What's going on?"

"I don't know. He said the reasons for this mission were personal, but he wouldn't go into details. Since when does Sasuke admit to having personal reasons for anything? I don't know why, but the look on his face...I could tell this was important to him so I let it go."

"Karin told me he used to live in Konoha. Is that true?", asked Juugo.

"Yes. That is one of the few things I know about Sasuke's life before he joined Orochimaru. That and the fact he used to be a ninja for Konoha. I asked him if these leaf nin he is watching with Karin were his friends but, I got nowhere with him."

"I'll take Sasuke's word for now, but when we get back home after this mission, I'm going to want a complete explanation from him. No excuses. Are you with me or not", Juugo asked.

"I'm with you. But for now, what do we do about these two Akatsuki?", Suigetsu asked.

"I've been thinking about them. You know, Suigetsu, there is more than one way to skin a cat. All we were suppose to do is keep them from interfering with Sasuke, right? Well what if I said we could keep those two occupied AND have some fun at the same time."

"I would say that sounds very interesting, Juugo my friend."

***********************

After about 10 minutes of darkness, Sakura and Sai offered to venture into the lobby to find out what the problem was, leaving Naruto and Hinata all alone.

They both walked into the lobby and at the same time both of their mouths dropped open.

It looked like a bomb went off in the room. Popcorn, soft drink cups, and hundreds of candy bars, some of them half-eaten, littered the carpeted floor along with wet napkins.

The now empty cash register was on it's side in a pool of nacho cheese. Shards of glass were precariously stuck in some of the colorful posters advertising next week's coming attractions, while some unknown sugary liquid was dripping from the ceiling.

They could hear all kinds of wild yells and shouts coming from the game room, where amidst all this destruction Juugo and Tobi were busy playing a rousing game of foosball, while the Suigetsu and Deidara were hunched over a Resident Evil video game.

Sakura was just about to complain about missing the end of the movie when she recognized all four of them and went into defensive mode. Sai immediately picked up on her body language and went into a fighting stance. But no one else seemed to be moving from their places.

"What the hell is going on?", Sakura shouted. Since when does Team Hebi and the Akatsuki work together?"

"It's Team Taka now!", somebody yelled.

"Sakura, you recognize these people?", Sai inquired.

"Sai, remind me to hurt you later, ok?", she replied. "Well, I'm waiting for an answer. Or am I gonna have to break some bones to get one?"

Appointing himself spokesman for the group, Suigetsu walked over to them, "No, Team Taka and Akatsuki are not working together. We're just here to watch Sasuke's back while he watches a movie with Karin. As for the Akatsuki, Deidara told me they are just here to spy on Naruto and you leaf nin. That's it."

"Sasuke's here? With Karin? Am I supposed to believe they came all the way to Konoha to have a date? Do you think because I have pink hair that means I'm stupid?"

"Sakura, I never thought you were stupid. Besides, I always thought your pink hair was pretty", Suigetsu replied, apparently getting too close to Sakura for comfort, causing Sai to approach the pair and ask, "If you are not here to cause problems, what now?"

Juugo approached the group and suggested, "Look, we all just want to relax and have fun for the rest of the night. Why don't you pretend you didn't see us and we'll pretend we didn't see you?"

Deidara joined the quartet and agreed, "Sounds like a plan to me. We'll go back to our hideout and report we didn't see anything useful, just a bunch of kids on a date. Our boss will be pissed, but oh well. I don't think he was expecting much from this mission anyway. In the meantime, why don't you just continue on with your dates and we'll go on with what we were doing, ok?"

"I agree with them Sakura."

"Not you too Sai? Whatever. Let's go get Hinata and Naruto. Maybe we can salvage what's left of our evening."

"Wait", Suigetsu implored, "Don't let on to Sasuke that you know he is here. You weren't supposed to find out, obviously."

"Fine. It's not as if I want to talk to the jerk!", Sakura yelled, dragging Sai along with her back to the screening room.

***********************

Meanwhile back in the screen room....

Sasuke was busy counting the pieces of gum stuck to the floor while Karin glared at him. "Well, are we going to leave or not. It doesn't look like we are going to get to see the end of the movie now. Besides I'm hungry", Karin whined.

"Fine. Let's go now.", Sasuke replied as he tried to rush her out the balcony door, in an attempt to avoid the leaf nin below them.

"So Hinata, looks like we won't get to see the end of the movie. How did you like it so far?, Naruto asked, concerned that this turn of events had somehow ruined the pleasant mood of their evening.

"I liked it a lot. Can we come back and see the rest?" asked Hinata.

"We sure can! Believe It! So, now what? We should wait until Sai and Sakura come back before we leave", Naruto replied.

Hinata leaned closer to him, and thinking she didn't hear him, he began to repeat himself, except more loudly, attracting the attention of Karin. Sasuke merely pretended he didn't hear a thing and continued walking to the exit.

"Sasuke, is there something you want to tell me?", Karin hissed, staring over the top of the balcony wall to discover Naruto and Hinata sitting very close together below them. Sasuke reluctantly followed her, and to his dismay, was rewarded with Hinata's voice.

"Naruto, I really like you", Hinata hesitantly confessed, hoping against hope that Naruto would finally express the same sentiments about her.

At that moment a really strange memory concerning one raven haired best friend came back to Naruto, the really embarrassing one that happened in front of all their classmates and suddenly he knew what he was supposed to do. Gently putting his hands on Hinata's shoulders he leaned towards her, his face inching towards her waiting lips....

"HI-YAH!", Sasuke yelled, jumping down from the balcony to land between them. "I don't think Neji would appreciate you taking advantage of his sweet innocent cousin like this!"

Karin could only stare crazily and yell down at him from the balcony, "What the hell are you doing Sasuke? We came here to be alone, not so you could fight your forever rival!"

Naruto added to the insults, "Sasuke, you jerk! What the hell! I was just about to get my first real kiss from a real girl! What are you doing here?"

Hinata, enraged with jealousy screamed at him, "Uchiha! You were always jealous of me and Naruto. You came all the way here to ruin our date, didn't you!"

Karin, climbed down from the balcony to stand next to Hinata and piped in, "Sasuke. Is that true? Did we come here on a wild goose chase just to ruin Naruto's date with Hinata? That is so creepy! And besides, I thought we were here on our date! I hate you! I never want to speak to you again!"

Sasuke stood speechless and watched his crazed teammate walk away. Staring at his two fellow leaf nin, he responded, "You're all delusional. Can't a guy go to the movies with his fellow teammate without being accused of plotting some heinous scheme!" And he promptly teleported away, no doubt to join his semi-evil trio somewhere else.

"Sasuke don't go!", Naruto cried, falling to his knees, just as Sai and Sakura reappeared.

"Naruto, can't you once in your life think about someone other than Sasuke!", Sakura yelled as she dealt a karate kick to his face.

Unfortunately things went from bad to worse, as Hinata began to cry, Sai said, "You both are most likely suffering from that "girl thing". I read about that at the library. We should go to a restaurant where we can buy you lots of chocolate and rare beef steaks. I heard those foods worked wonders. Once we're are done there, we can go someplace quiet and make out. I read that was supposed to be the perfect ending for a date.

Sai was just able to finish his sentence when Hinata thought practicing her new jutsu on him would be just the ticket to shutting him up, leaving him in a crumpled up ball of pain.

"Sakura, I'm hungry. Why don't we go watch the Chippendale dancers down at the Bijou? We've earned it", Hinata suggested.

"Cha! See 'ya losers!", Sakura yelled. And with that both girls left.

Naruto left with Sai shortly afterward, that is once he could stand without crying. As they entered the lobby, they were drawn over to the game room by the noise. Sasuke waved them over to the couch he was sitting on, holding a bag of ice over is right eye. Juugo and Suigetsu were lounging in some chairs playing cribbage. Tobi and Deidara were showing off their skills playing Dance Dance Revolution.

Noticing Sasuke's swollen black eye Naruto laughed "Ha ha ha! That's a nice look for you!"

"This coming from the guy with a fat lip! That looks like Sakura's work. And Sai. He's lying on the floor whimpering. What did the loser say to earn that?", Sasuke sneered, laughing at the same time.

"Hey, guys, you're ruining our chi", Juugo begged. Why don't you two take this bag of coins and play some air hockey. I'll take a look at Sai, I think I can heal him up a little."

"Might as well jerk, since you totally ruined our date night!", Naruto complained. And following Sasuke over to the game table, he said in a low voice only they could hear, "If you wanted me to go to the movies with you on your birthday again, why didn't you call me and ask, like a normal person? Just because you left Konoha doesn't mean I don't think of you as a friend, because I do, you know?"

"Naruto. You remembered?"

"Of course I did."

"But, I never got my birthday card!", Sasuke wailed, in a slightly whiny voice.

"Sasuke, did you check the mail today?"

"Ummm, no, we left before the mailman came, to get here early."

Naruto folded his arms across his chest and said, "So, who's the idiot now?"

Sasuke stared down at the floor, a look of embarrassment on his face, "So then you're not mad at me about the fight we had the last time we met?"

"I was a little mad at the time, but I'm not anymore. Like I could stay angry at you?", Naruto replied. Grinning from ear to ear, he started toward Sasuke, reaching out with open arms.

Before Naruto could deliver his usual birthday hug to him, Sasuke dodged out of the way and shouted, "I, Uchiha Sasuke, am the ultimate air hockey champion! Prepare to lose moron!"

***********************

_Rule number five from "The Konoha Ninja Handbook" -_ _If something can go wrong, it will!_

"Well, I don't know about you Deidara, but I had a good time!"

"You dolt! Our mission was a complete failure! We're going to have to tell our leader we didn't find out anything about Naruto. Great. Thank goodness, we lost a couple of members, recently. So, he most likely won't kill us."

"You worry too much. If I know our leader as well as I think I do, we'll be just fine", Tobi answered, an evil smile forming on his masked face.

***********************

"Home sweet home", Suigetsu said as they finally reached their cozy hideout. "I'm beat."

"It doesn't look like Sasuke or Karin are home yet. Where do you think they are?", Juugo asked, concerned for his teammates' welfare.

"Where ever they are, I'm sure they are just fine. They can take care of themselves. I'm going to bed."

"I'm going to wait for them here", Juugo said, getting himself comfortable on the couch, for what could be a long night. In a few minutes all that could be heard was the humming of a fluorescent night light and the husky snores of the sleeping giant.

***********************

On the way to the Bijou, Hinata and Sakura saw Karin hitchhiking and they pulled over to pick her up. "Hey, Karin want to join us at the Bijou? We're getting something to eat."

"Sure, Sakura, why not."

They three of them spent the rest of the evening laughing and joking. Not one mention was made of their former "dates". They had so much fun together, they decided they would make this their monthly ritual.

***********************

Sometime around 3 a.m. Sasuke and Naruto found themselves alone. Both Akatsuki and the remaining Team Taka bailed on them earlier, leaving the two to clean up the mess by themselves. Combining their wind and fire jutsu, and a little water canon action from Naruto's toads, they were able to clean up the place in no time.

"How about next year for your birthday we reserve the theater for a real party, with cake and everything. We could invite your team and whoever else you want."

"Sounds good to me Naruto. But how about we leave Akatsuki off the list?", Sasuke said as they both left the movie theater together, arm in arm.

Leaning close enough to whisper in Sasuke's ear, Naruto said, "Happy Birthday, Sasuke."

Sasuke leaned back into him in silent response, a real smile forming on his lips.

THE END.

***********************

***I know, Deidara blows himself up in order to take Sasuke out. I changed it here so I could write what I think is a funny piece of dialogue.


End file.
